From Bob Burg
In sunny Jupiter, Florida

Dear friend,

Do you ever have to deal with difficult people?

You know the ones I mean. Surly salesmen, micro-managers and meddling neighbors; rebellious teenagers, interfering relatives and angry spouses; customer (dis)service personnel, uncivil civil servants and - the just plain ornery.

How much more relaxed, stress-free and productive would your life be - what kind of difference would it make to you - if you could get even the most difficult people you encounter every day to work eagerly with you, instead of against you?

How much time would you save? How much more money could you make? How much more fun would your job be? How much more loving and peaceful would your family life become?

In short, how would you like to get anything you want, from even the most difficult people and circumstances?

You can, you know. And you can do it:

• Without argument, stress or shouting,
• Without manipulation or deception,
• Without being a doormat,
• Without trading away important parts of your life,
• Without sacrificing your principles,
• Without giving in to unreasonable demands,

The secret is an approach I call "Winning Without Intimidation."

Before I tell you about it, I'd like to show you an example of the difference this simple, but highly effective way of dealing with people can make. Consider these two possible versions of...

Have you ever had a day like this?

While you fix yourself a quick breakfast, your spouse starts griping at you (again) about all the time you spend away from home on business. A bitter discussion ensues, and your Eggo waffles start to feel like lead on your stomach.

Then, as you head out the door, your kids ask if you're going to be at their recital this weekend. When you explain that you'll be in Chicago on business, the youngest starts to cry, and your oldest looks at you like you just slapped him. You really start to hate your job - and you haven't even left the house!

You stop at your favorite coffee shop for a pick-me-up, and the cashier gives you an earful about how rude it is to only have a $20 bill when all you're buying is coffee.

What next?!

You walk into the office at 8:55, already frazzled. The first thing you discover is that your secretary of 7 years has quit over having to deal with Mr. Jones, affectionately known around the lunchroom as "The Client From Hell."

You call the hotel in Chicago to confirm your reservations and find that, not only has their computer never heard of you (your secretary quit, remember?), the reservations clerk doesn't want to!

While you wait on hold, trying to sort this out so you don't have to drive from the other side of town before doing your 7 AM presentation, Ralph, the office pest, crowds in to badger you for the fourth time this week about volunteering to be the new company PR rep.

The last thing you want to do right now is get in front of reporters. They're liable to get photos of you strangling Ralph!

Just then the reservations clerk comes back and tells you, just before she abruptly hangs up, that there is "no room at the Inn."

Great... Now you not only have to drive half way across Chicago at 6AM on a Saturday to get to your meeting on time, you have to rent a car at the last minute. The boss is NOT going to be happy about this.

Ah yes... the boss. He storms into your office just as you finally find someone willing to rent you a car in Chicago (after 3 hours of looking and at double the normal rates) and wants to know where the report is that he asked you to get to accounting by this afternoon.

What report? Nobody told you about any report...

By the time he leaves, you're sure you're about to get fired. And you're not sure you'd really mind at this point.

To top it off, you get pulled over on the way home. You drive away with a speeding ticket, and you know you were only 5 miles over the limit. What was up with that guy, anyway?

At dinner, the chill could kill a polar bear. Everyone is mad at you for having to go out of town.

How do they expect you to pay the bills if you don't do your job?! Don't they know what you go through for them?

As you sit down to try and relax for a few minutes before collapsing into bed, you wonder... Is it really worth it? What's the point?

Has the whole world gone nuts?

Sometimes it seems that way, doesn't it?

It's not the world that's gone nuts. It's the way we deal with each other. With a little thought and some help from "Winning Without Intimidation," here's how that day should have gone...

While you fix yourself a quick breakfast, your spouse kisses you on the cheek and reminds you to pack warm. It gets cold in Chicago this time of year. You don't want to be sick for that romantic getaway you have planned for the weekend after you get back, do you?

The kids grab you on the way out the door and tell you that they got one of their friends' parents to videotape their recital so you don't have to miss it. You're so proud of them for having thought of that! You leave for work with a little extra spring in your step.

You stroll into the office 15 minutes early, hot coffee in one hand and the brownie the cashier gave you (for being such a thoughtful customer) in the other. Your secretary smiles and hands you a message from "That nice Mr Jones."

You chuckle and think of how the rest of the office considered him a pain, and how easy it was to turn him into your best client. Now, he won't deal with anyone but you!

You call the hotel in Chicago to confirm your reservations, and there's a little glitch. After a few minutes of pleasant conversation, the reservations clerk tells you, "You're all set. Enjoy your stay with us!" You're really looking forward to this trip.

Ralph comes in to congratulate you on the new account you signed up yesterday, and asks if he could get some advice on a problem client he's been trying to get an appointment with.

As he leaves, the boss comes in and asks where the report is that he asked you to get to accounting by this afternoon.

You're confused but, after a few minutes, the boss strolls out, thanking you for your help in getting the matter straightened out. "You're a real problem solver," he says. "When you get back from Chicago, we should talk about that new position in the downtown office. They need someone like you there."

On the way home you look in the mirror and see flashing blue lights, and they aren't your spouses eyes.

Ooops.

You're a little nervous but the officer is considerate and, after a brief conversation, lets you off with a warning. "You were only over by 5 miles, so I can let you go. But please, be careful," he says. "There are some dangerous curves on this road."

How thoughtful! As you drive the rest of the way home, you look forward to finishing the perfect day with your family, and think how nice it will be to get that job in the downtown office.

Life is good, you think to yourself. And you smile.

In both examples you're dealing with the same human beings, in the same situations, but you get completely different results. What could make that kind of difference?

You might be tempted to think that getting those kinds of results requires changing the people around you. I promise you, it doesn't. It doesn't even require that you make any big changes.

The little difference that makes that huge difference is what I call "Winning Without Intimidation."

It's not a positive thinking thing, although it does create a more positive approach to others. It's not an impractical "feel good" sort of philosophy that ignores reality. (Haven't we all seen just about enough of those?) And it's not a crusading thing that adds stress to your life by requiring that you change yourself or other people.

It's how you look at your day to day contact with others. It's a perspective.

A perspective that's backed with specific examples and proven approaches that you can apply in your everyday life to get far more of what you want from others, without deceit, manipulation, or intimidation.

You can apply them even before you finish reading the ebook. They're so simple and so powerful that you'll be nothing short of amazed.

And you'll understand why so many people have so much trouble (just like you used to) getting things done. The key lies in an old, but very true, cliche.

... it's how you say it."

How many times have you heard that expression? Or said those words yourself?

It's actually a little of both in most cases, but how you say what you say is a powerful factor in getting the results you want.

One of the most common problems in communication is the thought "They know what I mean. Why do they have to play games?" Another is the idea that "People should pay more attention to what I say, rather than how I say it."

Both of these are wrong. And very dangerous to good communication. The person you're talking to doesn't know what you really mean unless you say it in a way that they understand.

For example, consider two friends of mine. After most discussions, they both walk away feeling confused and frustrated. He wonders why she downplays the issues and takes everything so personally. She thinks he looks down at her and wonders how he could be so cruel.

He comes from a family of strong opinions. If you'd ever heard them discussing anything serious, you'd think they were bitter enemies. Yet, the conversation can turn into a laugh fest at any time, and no one involved thinks anything of it a minute later.

For them, intensity is a sign of conviction, and blunt expression a token of respect.

She comes from a family where intensity is associated with anger and abusiveness. Speaking loudly is considered rude, and challenging someone's opinions is interpreted as belittling them. Her approach to discussion is more measured and calm.

To her, based on her experience, he seems angry and hostile. To him, based on his experience, she seems to treat things as being unimportant, or doesn't seem to be listening.

Each is communicating in the way that's most honest and sincere - for themselves.

This is only one example. If you can't relate to it personally I'll bet you know two people with just that problem, don't you?

This sort of difference causes more pain and stress than most people would believe - until they become aware of it and start to understand how common it really is.

Human beings interpret things based on their past experience. They're not deliberately misreading you. They're not even aware in many cases of why they assign the meanings they do to the things they do. The set of accumulated interpretations is called "recognition skills."

If the other person has learned that a certain way of speaking means a certain thing, then to them - it does. The fact that they're not hearing what you really mean isn't anyone's "fault," and it's not likely to change easily, if at all. It's automatic.

So is the response when you talk to them in ways they understand and accept!

That's where Winning Without Intimidation comes in...

There are a scary number of ways that communications can go wrong. There are almost as many ways as there are people communicating. In the end, they all boil down to a very small number of causes and motivations.

"Winning Without Intimidation" will show you how to identify the exact motivations involved in any situation. It then gives you specific approaches, including the exact wording to use, to turn those situations from average dealings (or potential disasters) to nearly certain successes.

All in ways that are so powerful, so respectful, and so honest that you can tell the person exactly what you're doing and why - and they'll thank you for it!

This can help you to achieve astounding success in your career or business, to make your family life and relationships happier and more fulfilling, and to remove nearly all the stress from your day to day interactions with everyone you meet... including the most difficult of people.

In fact, it's very likely that those difficult people will become your most enjoyable and supportive associates!

"Winning Without Intimidation" outlines over 150 different situations, with clear examples of how to deal with them, so that you can apply the ideas in the book immediately, specifically, and very effectively.

The electronic version of the book contains twice the information the original did, and is far more detailed and specific in providing ways for you to make things happen.

When you use "Winning Without Intimidation," you'll find that virtually every dealing you have with others is easier, more pleasant, more productive and less stressful.

You'll find, as you begin to use these techniques, that:

• Your children will start to come to you with their problems, instead of waiting for you to discover them. After a while, they'll bring you their concerns before they become problems!
• Your spouse will come to you looking for agreement, rather than argument. (And won't THAT be nice!)
• Your co-workers and your boss will start to come to you to fix their problems, rather than trying to fix the blame.
• Your employees will take greater responsibility, and a more active interest in the success of your business.
• Salespeople will help you find the best deals, instead of trying to load your order up for bigger commissions.
• Instead of contradicting you at every turn, your friends will come to you for advice.
• Customer service people will not only be easier to deal with, they'll often go that extra mile to make your experience easier and more pleasant.
• Civil servants, even police, will go out of their way for you, often to the point of bending the rules to help you get things done.
• ... Nearly everyone you meet will go out of their way to help you. They'll do it because they want to, and they'll feel better about themselves for having done it!

You'll be able to use your time and energy for the things that really matter!

Let's face it: In the end, all other things being the equal, people tend to do business with, and refer their friends to, people they know, like and trust.

With "Winning Without Intimidation," you will be that person.

I'm not going to promise you hundreds of pages worth of extra bonus books that you won't have time to read or use. Instead, I'm going to pack some extra bonus skills into the "Winning Without Intimidation" system that you'll see growing as you use and master the system.

You'll find yourself becoming:

• The "Go To" Person. You'll become known as the person to count on when something needs to get done and done right.
• The Trusted Confidante. You'll be the person everyone trusts to keep things in confidence. Why? Because you understand them, of course.
• The Team Leader. You'll have a reputation as someone that gets people working together eagerly for a common purpose. Won't that be better than being told, "Bob, you've got to start being a team player!"
• The Seasoned Pro. You'll be the one that new folks come to for advice. Your ability to quickly develop rapport with people will put you in the position of knowing more about what goes on around you than top management. (This is a very useful position to be in!)
• The Closer. The one who makes the tough sales. This will get you more access to the bigger deals, and the bigger commissions that come with them. It will also mean more referrals, as tough prospects respect people who can get the job done without sneaky tactics or manipulation.
• The VIP. Someone who gets great service - everywhere. Yes, even this. You'll quickly find that waitpeople, maitres de, even cashiers will start to treat you like a celebrity - anywhere you go.
• The Finisher. The person who can start project after project and guide each one to a successful completion. Whether it's something for your family, your home, your community or your business, you'll be able to succeed easily by getting the cooperation of the people around you. You'll get more done, in less time, than ever before.
• The Dealmaker. You'll be able to get agreement from people that others often can't even get appointments with.
• The Doer. The ability to get results in any situation will be your signature trait. And there's nothing that will take you farther in the direction of your dreams than that.

You'll find all of these things coming about naturally as you master the art of Winning Without Intimidation.

Much less than you'd think. The cost is a few hours to read the book (which you can download within minutes of ordering), a little thought in applying it, and less than $20 (AsAManThinketh.net subscribers pay just $17.97).

What's it worth? Only you can answer that. Is there...

• Someone in your life you'd like to have a closer, more open and trusting relationship with?
• A business associate you'd like to turn into an ally in getting things done?
• A friend or family member you'd like to get along with better? Or again?
• Any difficult person or situation you'd like to take control of and turn to mutually respectful and enjoyable terms?

If so, I think you'll agree that this will be one of the best investments you could make in yourself and your relationships.

Winning Without Intimidation will make a difference tomorrow, next week and next year - in fact, for as long as you live. And that's just how long I guarantee it.

For as long as you live.

If you feel, at any time, that Winning Without Intimidation isn't worth a hundred times what you've invested, just let me know. I'll refund the full purchase price of $19.97 immediately (AsAManThinketh.net subscribers pay just $17.97). No questions asked.

If your relationships, transactions and business dealings are all exactly the way you'd like them to be - don't order. However, if you have even occasional challenges, I recommend that you get this book today. You can be downloading it within minutes, and start "Winning Without Intimidation" within the hour.

Someone once said that "Insanity is doing the same thing the same way and expecting different results." Another wise man remarked that "All progress requires the courage to change."

Make the change that will make all the difference. Order and download today (AsAManThinketh.net subscribers pay just $17.97).

Yours in winning,

Bob Burg

PS: This is a downloadable ebook, in PDF (Acrobat) format. It can be read on any computer.

If you're one of the many who bought the older print version, you're going to be pleasantly surprised. The electronic version you're ordering today has twice the information that was included in the original!

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PS: In case you'd like to hear what some others think, here are comments from a few people who have benefitted from reading "Winning Without Intimidation":

"Bob Burg ranks right up there with Dale Carnegie and Norman Vincent Peale. In WINNING WITHOUT INTIMIDATION, he shows you how to take any people challenge you face and have everybody come out a winner. Powerful, practical and easy to use."

John Milton Fogg,
Author of "The Greatest Networker in the World"


"WINNING WITHOUT INTIMIDATION overflows with the secrets of true persuasion -- which literally means, to give good advice in advance. Bob Burg has done it! This new book is dynamic, delightful and abundantly full of every tip you will ever need to MASTER the art of Positive Persuasion."

Dottie Walters,
Author of "Speak & Grow Rich"


"Bob Burg offers an enormous menu of persuasion techniques. And he serves them up with dozens of anecdotes that show exactly how they work...loaded with some of the most practical advice on persuasion that I've ever seen."

Jack Gillespie, Editor,
Communication Briefings


"WINNING WITHOUT INTIMIDATION is a book whose time has come! Sensational!"

Peter Lowe,
President, Peter Lowe International, Success Rallies


"BUY THIS BOOK! Networking expert Bob Burg has created another win-win for every reader. WINNING WITHOUT INTIMIDATION is packed with informative and inspirational advice that can provide the competitive edge in your interactions with other people and help make you successful in any business."

Pam Lontos,
Author of "Don't Tell Me It's Impossible Until After I've Already Done It"


"Nobody likes to feel manipulated. Remember the old saying --People don't care how much you know until they know how much you care. The key to success is in developing relationships. In WINNING WITHOUT INTIMIDATION Bob Burg helps us understand this concept and apply it to everyday life. When dealing with difficult situations or people the goal is to solve the problem not win the war."

Dexter Yager,
Author of "Dynamic People Skills"


"A sensational book! The art of positive persuasion becomes an easy skill to learn in the capable hands of Bob Burg as he leads us, step by step, through the process of WINNING WITH OUT INTIMIDATION. It's an essential tool in mastering interpersonal relations."

Luella Nash Le Vee,
Editor, Winners newsletter

"The wisdom and humility of Bob Burg are reflected in his sharing the best and surest ways TO WIN!"

Charlie "Tremendous" Jones,
Author of "Life Is Tremendous"


"I have followed Bob's suggestions and have watched my charisma quotient skyrocket by speaking to folks in a way that they can hear my requests and want to act upon them to support me because they feel as though they like and trust me. Bob's philosophy is based on love and support and pressure-free. A great, life-changing book!"

Dr. Joe Rubino
Author, "The Magic Lantern: A Fable About Leadership, Personal Excellence and Empowerment"


And some letters from readers:

Dear Bob:

Just wanted to drop you a line and let you know how your ideas helped me this week.

I received a registered letter from my landlord (now there's a clue something bad is about to happen). I opened it and couldn't believe my eyes, he was giving me notice that at the end of my lease that I would have to either buy the house or move, and that he would not honor our agreement for me to extend my lease.

My normal reaction would have been, well, anger. But I had just read my first copy of your e-zine, which reminded me of what I learned reading your book "Winning Without Intimidation," so instead I responded.

To make a long story short at the end of our long but pleasant conversation, we now agree I can

1. Extend my lease with no increase,
   
2. break my lease and still get back 100% of my deposit, or
   
3. Move out at the end of the lease, my choice.

Add to that the fact that after 4 months he finally has allowed me to buy a pump for the pool cleaner and take it out of my rent check, and your book has paid me about a 2000% return on my investment. If I could only do that in the stock market.

Thanks and keep up the good work

Ken,
West Palm Beach


I want to tell you a quick story. I may have told you this but I am training for my first marathon on June 4. Originally, I was to be running this weekend in Monterey, CA. My partner and I decided to postpone for various reasons. However, I forgot to cancel my hotel room reservations.

I called tonight to cancel. No problem, I think, I am giving them 24 hours notice, right? Wrong. The woman at the desk tells me that there is a 72 hour cancellation notice policy on my reservation. She can't cancel and I will have to pay all 5 nights...at $149 per night!

I ask to talk with the manager. As I start to get a bit angry and am waiting to be connected to the manager, my wife, Yvonne yells from the other room...

"Use the 8 words!"

Vivian the manager picks up her extension. I say, "Hi Vivian, I'm Greg Batton. How are you this evening?"

"Fine" Vivian the manager says, "what can I help you with?"

I say, "I realize that it's not your job to fix my screw-ups, but I have a problem" I went on to describe my reservation situation.

Vivian the manager says, "No problem, I will cancel your reservations"

Bingo.

Thanks.

Greg


Dear Bob,

I immediately began reading "Winning without Intimidation" and have found it to be such an inspiration! My relationships with everyone and with MYSELF have improved, but especially my relationship with my 7 year old son! Thanks a million!

Anne


I just wanted to say that I spoke to you many months ago. I was pretty negative because I had already done just about everything that you say in your books, but without the same spin or finesse.

When I spoke to you and you recommended your books, I was even more skeptical that I was being "sold" another product. I did in fact buy them, read them, re-read them...and employ them and I am happy to say that they have made life much better. I am a believer...and have bought them for gifts and have recommended them to people who I know that have had some rough times or are going through them.

Thanks.

Joseph, FL


"In my job as coordinator of a nationwide volunteer outreach program, I work with more than 100 volunteers in almost every state of the union. These volunteers provide educational activities in non-traditional settings to a general audience mostly in smaller, underserved communities.

"By incorporating some of your techniques, I have been able to maintain structure in a volunteer's activities (like reporting in a timely manner) without sacrificing his or her enthusiasm. Everybody wins."

Kay, California


"Just wanted to let you know, that by using the methods outlined in your book I have made thousands of dollars in fee income and dramatically grown my business. Thanks for a great book with strategies that are easy and really work!"

Best Regards,

Mike,
New Jersey

"Your book "Winning Without Intimidation" is amazing. I am reading it for the second time and I've never read a book twice. It has given me confidence. I knew the techniques would work as soon as I read them. I have been achieveing not only financially but relationship wise also. I would like to thank you for sharing your knowledge."

Dave,
Newfoundland

"I wanted to let you know how much WWI is helping in my life. I'm not a 'salesperson' in the formal sense of the word, but my work is with people who happen to be living in and through some of the most horrendous circumstances of life......

All of my clients are HIV+, the majority of them addicted to drugs, all learning to live with this chronic/terminal illness with dignity, hope and most of all, respect. As a counselor, I am finding that the lessons in WWI are most helpful reminders of how to relate to people with decency and respect. Thank you."

Annie,
Pennsylvania


I attend Palm Beach Atlantic College, and currently am enrolled in a Mediating Organizational Conflict class taught by Dennis Giannetti, MS. He encouraged us to read your book and I bought one and read it on a plane as I headed for an interview. I used many of the things which you mentioned in the book and through asking questions and directing the tempo of the meeting I was offered a position and they are even revamping my compensation package after meeting with the Board of Directors of this company.

Thank you for your insight, keep the reading material coming, I am now a BIG FAN!

Sincerely,
Roger,
Florida


Hi Bob,

Once in a great while we come across someone whose ideas, thoughts and wisdom shed new light and understanding on concepts which may appear obvious, but somehow provide a stumbling block at times. I first came across the incredible Burg philosophy when I read 'Winning Without Intimidation'. I must admit I have read, re-read and read again WWI and in a short space of time have already applied many of the concepts that you espouse. I never realized just how easy it is to "get what you want without 'intimidating' people". I have found through reading your books, and now your ezine, an incredible wealth of information and ideas that I now share with anyone who will listen!

I cannot Thank You enough for sharing your 'secrets' with me...I feel as though I am a member of a special group of people whose lives are enhanced and enriched by your philosophy. By way of saying Thanks, I will encourage as many people as I can to master the art of 'Winning Without Intimidation' and sign up for your ezine.

Beth,
New Jersey


Hello Bob,

"You have changed my family and me with your book, 'Winning Without Intimidatiion.' It is so true to our everyday activities how we deal with people. This book should be part of the high school curriculum."

Yosh,
British Columbia


Bob,

"Thanks for all your incredible information. I put some of your lessons to the test on Mother's Day when my 5-year-old daughter, Maxine, refused to give my wife her Mother's Day card. Maxine was upset because my 2-year-old son, Noah, wouldn't pay attention to Maxine's directions for presenting the card. Since Noah wouldn't listen, Maxine said she wasn't going to hand over the card. She went off and pouted. I calmly explained to Maxine that Noah was too young to understand, and she was hurting Mommy's feelings.

After considering it awhile longer, Maxine delivered the card, along with hugs and kisses! It got even better when later in the day, Maxine said, 'Thank you, Daddy, for talking to me.'

Keep up the great work."

Keith, FL


Hi, Bob!

It's Heidi from Chicago. I just wanted to let you know that after attending your seminar and reading your book, I've had amazing results from applying the basic principles you discuss. Check this out:

1) I wanted a ceiling fan in my apartment, so I called the apartment handyman. Knowing that he didn't like tenant requests that began with, "Well, Keri has one in her apartment... " I started out instead with, "Look, if you can't do this, I'll understand. I don't want to get you in any trouble with Pat. But if you could install a ceiling fan in my place, I'd really appreciate it." He agreed to install it next week!

2) I now start absolutely EVERY sales call by thanking the person in advance, "Gee, you guys look really busy here. I really appreciate your taking a few minutes out of your schedule to meet with me today."

3) A friend and I had a falling-out two years ago and had not been able to reconcile after numerous attempts. I went to visit her and put your listening skills to work, choosing to respond, not react to her point of view, and we came to an understanding of each other's points of view. We are now close friends again for the first time in two years.

4) Over the July 4th holiday, I was robbed. Someone climbed in a window and rummaged through my jewelry armoire. Once I'd made a safety check, called the police, and determined the loss, I chose to respond by being thankful that I still had everything that was important to me: my health, my life, and my family and friends. By the time the police arrived, I was calm and smiling, even cracking jokes.

Thanks for your advice. Not only have I read your book, I'm lending it to others.

Heidi


Hi Bob,

"I have your book, "Winning Without Intimidation" and it is fantastic! Since reading it I have had promotion at work and my other busines interests have really taken off as well. Many thanks.

Willie,
Scotland


Bob, I wanted to thank you for giving us realistic examples of how to diffuse a "bully."

Each time I follow your advice in a real-life situation, I am amazed (and proud) of how well it works. I used to only rely on intimidation to achieve results. I didn't know any better. You, and Dale Carnegie, have helped change my life. Thanks for making every day a great WWI Day!"


"Bob, I just read WWI Issue 3 regarding the 'I Message'. I used the technique last night with the kids as they were doing homework. The result - much less stalling, complaining, and, of course, stress."

John,
Indiana


"Your book already saved me on TWO traffic tickets!

Lynn,
Illinois


Dear Bob,

"...It is interesting to note that on Friday I was stopped by a policeman and implemented what you discussed at the conclusion of your presentation. It worked like a charm and I was given a *warning* for speeding! The fine would have been $165 and points so thank you and believe me I am heeding the officer's advice and slowing down. I was wrong. He was very courteous and appreciated me admitting that I was wrong!"

Peter,
Florida

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