How you think of others
“He will find that as he alters his thoughts towards things and other people, things and other people will alter towards him.”
— James Allen
Reflection
Allen observes that as a man alters his thoughts toward others, they respond to him in new ways. We often think people’s attitudes toward us are fixed, but they are frequently mirroring what they sense from our own hearts. Suspicious thoughts breed distance; generous thoughts invite warmth.
If you secretly expect the worst from people—assuming they will disappoint, misuse, or ignore you—you will approach them guarded, and they will likely feel that. Conversations become shallow. Relationships stay brittle. But when you deliberately choose to think of others with goodwill, assuming their best intentions unless clearly proven otherwise, your tone, expression, and presence change. People feel safer around you.
This doesn’t mean being naïve or ignoring genuine danger. It means refusing to let cynicism be your default setting. You recognise that most people are struggling, not scheming; confused, not malicious. When you meet them with understanding and respect, you often awaken better qualities in them.
Allen’s principle is simple: your thoughts about others are not private. They leak out in a thousand subtle ways. Change those thoughts, and over time, you change the atmosphere of your relationships.
And that’s worth thinking about.
— Vic Johnson
Putting It Into Practice
- Notice one person you tend to view negatively and intentionally think of one strength or good intention they may have.
- Enter your next conversation assuming the other person wants a good outcome, and see how that shifts your tone.
- Pray for someone who irritates you, asking God to bless and grow them instead of rehearsing their faults.
One Question To Ponder
If others are quietly responding to the way you think about them, what kind of thoughts have they been feeling from you?
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